I realized that it is now Saturday, and I only reviewed one, yes ONE film this week, which sucks massive amounts of balls and dicks. I think I mentioned a long time ago wanting to add a review every other day, roughly three or four entires a week. Clearly, one is less than both three AND four, so I figured I would tell you guys I tried watching three different films over the week that I gave so little of a shit about, I just shut them off. One film was called “Evilenko” which starred Malcolm McDowell as a weird old killer who really “took care” of young boys and girls, if ya know what I mean. It was more of a crime drama than a horror film or thriller, and when the options were A) Finish watching a film that wasn’t bad, but did absolutely nothing for me, or B) Eat onion dip, watch The Office and do laundry, I went with B. Film number two was called “Dumpster Baby“, which I added to my queue probably four years ago due to, as they say, the “LOL” factor. It’s a Troma release, which I hate, and this film was no different. You don’t even see the baby, you just feel like you are watching a bunch of Juggalos that made a film. Everything is annoying, nothing makes sense, and you want everything to die. Film three was “Killer Klowns from Outer Space“. I know it’s a cult classic, but I had absolutely no interest. Rampaige and I needed something to watch, and when I came across it, she said “No! Don’t watch that, it’s scary. Please, don’t make me watch it.” I immediately hit the PLAY RIGHT FUCKING NOW BUTTON and then fell asleep. I’m not afraid of clowns, so this film did nothing for me, but I can see it being a nostalgic memory for people. That being said, I am STILL open to taking suggestions for films, whether they be left as a comment or emailed to me through a link that you will find under the “How to make sense of this site…” tab on top. In the meantime, feel free to look at movies I did finish and relive the glories of the past, and for all current updates, make sure to check http://www.twitter.com/wolfman_cometh.
OH MAN. You’re on a whole different level if you couldn’t get into Killer Klowns. That’s a Halloween staple around this household. “Whatta ya gonna do? Knock my block off?” (That’s a line from the movie. You missed out.)