I hope I didn’t confuse any of you by using the term “ganja”, considering this post has absolutely nothing to do with weed. I just really like the term “extrava-ganja”, which I learned from a festival of marijuana back in good old Amherst, MA. Instead of talking about ganja, I attempted to have Rampaige either write a post or write a review. She agreed to do it, but then didn’t do a goddamned thing about it. Rather than risk putting off my 300th post even further, I figured I would take my top viewed images and put them all in one post for easy access. Have I done that before? I don’t think I’ve done that before. I’ll be making sure to see what I saved the file as, so maybe you’ll get some insight as to why people searched for them. In descending order, they are…
5) Insidious movie demon red face Patrick Wilson
I guess when this movie came out, as well as when it was released on home video, people really wanted a clear shot of that guy who Rampaige claimed looked like he was “about to jump up to do a drum solo”. This was the first image of the movie that I had seen, so I had to make sure to include it in my review for Insidious.
4) prepare to eat poop
This was back before I realized that naming the images had any relevancy and I really just used codes to make sure I remembered what the image was, this was a scene from The Human Centipede (First Sequence) where the lady looks like she’s about to eat poop. I guess maybe searching Google for things like “human centipede” and “poop” would cause this image to appear in the search field.
Another one of those “I don’t give a fuck what the file is named”, and considering a character is being ripped in half, I was looking for any sort of code that had “rip” in it. I think this picture gets clicked a lot because the source image is rather large, so if someone were looking for this image in a higher resolution, I win!
2) Scott Pilgrim vs the World Mary Elizabeth Winstead Michael Cera
Do I really need to come up with my reasoning on why I think people click this image? I knew it would be something people would want to see, so I found the biggest picture of I could so people could easily find it. I think the only way this would have been my most clicked image is if I used the words “underwear” or “panties” in the file name. But instead, the top spot belongs to…
1) Stan Helsing Diora Baird Kenan Thompson Good Burger
People are often Googling to prove that Diora Baird was in Good Burger, so it’s no surprise that this image is so popular. Okay fine, that’s probably not it. I have a feeling that most people who have seen Stan Helsing are going to eventually look for pictures of Diora Baird, or possibly Desi Lydic, and the poor lighting and facial expressions appear to be confusing enough to make people look at it. I also have a feeling that I might have used the term “boobs” a time or two in that review, which leads me to believe some people, who are perverts obviously, are Googling things like “diora baird stan helsing boobs”. Okay so I cheated, I know for a FACT that people type that shit into Google because this magic box in front of me has told me so. I’m sorry, Kenan Thompson, but I highly doubt anyone coming to this website was looking for images of you defeating those cocksuckers over at Mondo Burger.
That does it, folks! I enjoy making top five lists, because it makes me feel like I have the authority to give things numerical ratings, like I’m some important guy who does things like that. If any of you have any other suggestions on top five lists that you’d like to see me do, feel free to leave me a comment about it.